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# Undecided
- URL: https://www.andyposner.org/undecided/
- Published: 2024-10-29T05:54:36.000Z
- Updated: 2026-07-21T01:16:28.000Z
- Description: I’ve been staring at the wall for hours, wondering why the paint won’t peel off, what’s holding the plaster together.
- Author: Andy
- Tags: America on the Brink, poetry, Politics, #Migrated-1784090317409, #wp, #wp-post, #Import 2026-07-15 04:39

*“Fallout spreads from racist rhetoric at Trump’s MSG rally.” -* [*Politico*](https://www.politico.com/news/2024/10/28/trump-madison-square-garden-rally-tony-hinchcliffe-00185793?ref=andyposner.org)

I’ve been staring at the wall for hours,  
wondering why the paint won’t peel off,  
what’s holding the plaster together.

I twirl a pen, lean back in my chair,  
regard its tired squeal, regard the sky-  
like expanse of the ceiling, turn over

in my mind the choices before me. I  
ask the wood for answers, imagine its  
beams exposed to my eyes, naked as fear,

try to find meaning in the grain. I blink,  
I search in vain for a window, for light. Now  
it’s pitch-dark and the wall is laughing at me,

the wall is moving like a spider, like ink  
dripping down my back, the wall is heavy,  
the wall is teeming with black mold, is a

window unto nothing, a sensory deprivation  
chamber, still my senses are alive, I can feel  
every fiber of carpet moving like worms

beneath my feet, the doors have fallen away,  
there is a void like a lump in the throat, the air  
is charged as though a storm were coming

but there is no weather here, a loudspeaker  
announced that nature died at the sawmill  
and there will be no funeral, tomorrow the

sprinklers will run, the mail will come on time:  
I have been staring at the wall for years,  
undecided if I want it all to come crashing down.